November 17, 2011 § Leave a comment
Knowing how to converse in a polished way is a key skill to being a chic lady. It is important to learn how to visit with people of all different backgrounds and personalities. No one wants to be stuck with the person who is boring, talks too much, or talks too little.
Listening can be a harder skill to learn than talking. Most people have no problem talking about themselves. Make every effort to ask questions about things like vacations, shopping places, and hobbies. Avoid questions that bring up taboo subjects like politics, money, or religion. If you find the conversation coming to a halt, try including others around you into the conversation. When you respond to questions, always do so in a poised way. Never offer negative or controversial opinions.
Keep A Tight Lip
I know it can be hard, but try to use tact and discretion at all times. Bad conversation comes from those who talk too much. You can’t take back the things you say, so save your gossip and bashing for a very private conversation between your most trusted confidants.
Being funny can be a wonderful tactic in conversation, but try not to be humorous at the expense of others. You may get a laugh, but those laughing on the inside are disapproving on the inside.
Never brag or try to intimidate others with your brilliance or skills. Never make anyone feel inferior.
Always be sincere and don’t fake it if you don’t feel it. Do not say, “We should get lunch.” with no intentions of following through.
Speaking clearly and with diction is even more important than the words you are speaking. Avoid using made-up words and terms to make yourself easier to understand. Do you ever listen to your voice on a recording and cringe? Do you mumble or jumble your words? Do you use annoying catchphrases or filler words? Or worse, do you swear? Be mindful of the things you say and in the manner you say them. Make sure your volume is at a good level. Also, there is an art to making a stellar first impression by saying everything you need to say in as few words as possible.
Things You Should Never Do In A Polite Conversation
*Laugh too loud
*Talk about medical or emotional ailments
*Stand too close
*Talk about yourself too much
The Art Of Accepting A Compliment
Do not act shy or embarrassed when someone gives you a compliment. A simple smile and a thank you is the classiest and most chic way to react. Never agree with it, though.Try not to give away too much information. No need to say how much you spent on your dress or shoes. Keeping a bit of mystery is the best thing you can do.
The Art Of Giving A Compliment
As you are accepting compliments with grace, do not forget to give them out as well. As good as you feel as you receive a compliment, it will give others that same feeling. If you compliment too much, you may come off as insincere. Be careful to always say what you mean and mean what you say. Even if you have to consciously look for things that impress you enough to give a compliment. Be careful when complimenting an article of clothing, shoes, or handbags. Use caution when asking where the item was purchased. Some women don’t want to give away their favorite boutique. Never as about cost.
Remember that anyone can engage in a conversation. But a good conversation or a bad conversation can be the difference in a good time or a bad time. Don’t let your conversation skills intimidate you. It takes work and practice. Always go into conversational situations with intention, purpose, and awareness and you will be the one at the party everyone wants to talk to.
October 25, 2011 § 1 Comment
Sometimes I feel like I was born in the wrong decade, possibly the wrong era. I wish that more women held manners and etiquette in a higher regard. But, then again, a ladylike woman is bound to make a strong impression on any person she meets, because you don’t see that too often. Being un-ladylike exudes laziness which, honestly, can be the easier route at times. Holding up social graces will not only make you a better person, but will make the world that much more pleasant. It will also ensure you will be a desired presence whether it’s at work, a party, or finding that perfect man. Yes, I know some of the rules of etiquette have changed. Etiquette is always evolving. So what does it mean to be a chic, fabulous, lady in a modern world?
What You Say Does Matter
It is as simple as manners. Do you remember when you were taught to always say “please” “thank you” “thank you for having me.” When did we stop using those phrases? It is as easy as just saying “thank you” when a waiter refills you drink or a nice smile and nod when someone opens the door for you. The things you say and the way you say them is a direct reflection of your inner beauty. And, yes, it may take some practice.
A smile is usually always infectious. Don’t you want the reputation of always having a smile or a nice demeanor? If someone asks “How are you?” Sometimes, it’s best to say, “Fine, or Great, thank you,” Even if you are not. Depending on if you are talking to an acquaintance or a best friend. Others will be drawn to you and actually be happy to be around you.
Some Ways to Make Someone’s Day Even Better
*You look amazing!
*I thought about you the other day.
*I’m so happy to see you!
*I love your outfit!
Sometimes it’s best to make the first move and introduce yourself first. When the other person gives you their name, go ahead and use it right away. By saying the name out loud, it will help you to remember it.
When introducing yourself to an elderly person, the formal way to use their name is with their title and surname, like “Mrs. Smith,” unless they say otherwise.
So, we’ve all been in a situation where we have forgotten a name. It’s best if you can discretely ask another person to remind you. If you can figure it out, then it is perfectly fine to apologize and then ask for their name again. Chances are, they’ve forgotten a name before too. If someone gets your name wrong, correct them and then make light of the situation.
If you have brought a guest with you, it is your responsibility to introduce them to others and bring out their similarities or likenesses.
It is always best to make the person you are talking to feel very comfortable and relaxed around you.
Tips On Overall Good Etiquette
*Always smile when greeting someone.
*Stand up when others enter the room.
*Don’t use cell phones during meals or text in company.
*Try not to leave the table during a meal.
*Drink a glass of water to match every glass of wine.
*Always write a thank you note when appropriate.
*Dress appropriately. Don’t show too much skin at formal events.