I have always felt a gift diamond shines so much better than the one you buy for yourself. – Mae West
July 26, 2011 § Leave a comment
The ring. It’s a big deal. It sets the tone of your engagement. When you pop the question and she’s 100% in love with the ring (like she loves you), then you’re golden. If it’s not the right ring, you may have a problem. Here are some ways to avoid the guessing game to start your engagement off in a blissful way.
Let’s get real. The ring is all about her.
Yes, a good relationship is all about compromise and give and take, especially in a marriage. Lean a little more towards the “give” and get her what she wants. Taking her ring shopping and having her pick out her own engagement ring may take some of the fun out of the process. If you don’t want her to do all but pay for the ring, start asking her questions.
What shape of stone do you like? Oval, round, marquise, princess, emerald…
What type of metal do you want? White gold, yellow gold, platinum…
What style? Classic, simple, vintage, bling-bling…
Look at the jewelry she already owns. That will tell you a lot about her style and what type of jewelry she likes to wear. Ask her family and friends. Even take them with you when you go to pick it out. It is extremely important for you to keep your opinion out of the process and make it all about her.
Find a good jeweler.
Bottom line, go where you feel comfortable. Build a good rapport with the jeweler. Make sure it is someone who you can trust and someone who is patient and one who truly cares about getting you the perfect ring and not the “sale”. See what their policy is on tightening loose diamonds, re-dipping, other maintenance, etc. You may find one who is willing to service the ring at little to no charge as it experiences wear and tear. Also, make sure your jeweler has a good return/exchange policy.
Now, unless she specifically says she wants another stone, like a sapphire or emerald, do NOT even think about getting her something other than a diamond. No surprise stones! Most likely, every girl at some point has dreamed about getting a diamond, and for some, their engagement ring might be their first diamond. Not a good time to decide she needs a sapphire because she likes blue.
If you’ve shopped for diamonds before, then you are probably familiar with the whole cut, color, clarity, and carat. I will spare you the details here and let you hear the presentation from the jeweler. I promise, you will hear all about it. Just use your best judgement when picking out your diamond and find the best for what you can afford. It’s best to know ahead of time what cut she likes.
Make sure the jeweler can provide the diamond’s certification. If he/she does not have the certification, don’t buy the diamond!
The band of gold (or platinum)
This can be even more overwhelming than picking out the diamond. This is where knowing her style really comes in handy. The setting also gives your diamond the compliment it needs. It will transform a beautiful gem into a stylish piece. Get the opinions of her closest friends and family for this one. Make sure you know if she’s all about the yellow gold or the white gold/platinum. You really don’t want to surprise her on that one.
All in all, listen to her. She’s probably been dropping hints since your dating became serious. She may tell you what she wants in subtle hints or she may tell you word for word what she wants. Either way, listen to her and you can’t go wrong.